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26th-Oct-2008 08:38 pm
Went to OVFF. Took Friday off of work, so I drove down early in the day.

Friday was fabulous... except I was tired (as usual) so I missed most of the filk.

Saturday ... was.

Nobody's fault but mine -- can't say what the reasons were -- but I started taking things -- not even "wrong" things, just things that didn't agree with my then-current mind-set (perhaps I'm over-sensitized due to the political season we're in?) started setting me off. I ended up spending lots of time up in the room, much of it crying. I was mean to a friend who'd telephoned -- probably because he didn't say what my insanity thought would be "the" right thing. Don't know. I tried to participate in the filking, but many of my insecurities and ... deep set wackinesses rose up and bit me hard.

Walked past a room with the lovely voice of someone I know harmonizing... the room was filled with people I like... but overall too many people that I couldn't make myself walk in. Walked past a room with a single performer (at that time) -- he caught my eye and smiled, and I felt lots better, but even thinking of going into the room had me crying again, so I just went back up to the room.

The people who came over, talked with me, rubbed my back, said nice things really helped. (After all I _didn't_ drive back home on Saturday... I spent about half an hour out in the car wondering if I should.) And I apologize to anyone to whom I was rude. Not my intent, but I was pretty well falling apart.

One of my favorite aspects of Saturday at OVFF is the auction -- run by a real auctioneer. He puts on a FINE show -- and he interacts well with us, although we're probably quite different from any other group he's had to auction for.

Sunday was good, and I nudged my shyness and insecurity aside to introduce myself to ... at least 4 people whom I'd not known. Unfortunately, I really had to leave by about 4pm in order to get home before it got too dark and I got too tired.

Overall a great convention.
27th-Oct-2008 09:51 pm (UTC)
I was very glad to see you, but (a) couldn't think what to say, and (b) was generally wandering around in a fog all weekend anyway.
28th-Oct-2008 02:19 pm (UTC)

I think I never see as much of people as I want to at cons -- but I'm happy for what I get.

It was great to see you.
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